What You Really Need to Know Before Starting EMDR Therapy
This blog is adapted from one of our recent podcast episodes. You can take a listen at the button above.
EMDR Is Not a Quick Fix (And That’s a Good Thing)
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is one of the most researched and recommended treatments for trauma. But despite its growing popularity, EMDR is often misunderstood, especially on the internet.
If you’ve read a Reddit thread or seen a social media post claiming EMDR is either a miracle cure or a mental health disaster, here’s the truth: it’s neither. EMDR is a powerful tool for healing trauma, but like any form of therapy, it requires the right timing, the right clinician, and realistic expectations.
What Actually Happens in EMDR?
The flashy part of EMDR - the part people often remember - is the use of bilateral stimulation (think: guided eye movements, tapping, or light bars). But that’s just one piece of the process.
EMDR includes eight structured phases, which typically unfold in this order:
History and treatment planning
Preparation and resourcing (building emotional regulation skills)
Assessment (identifying the target memory)
Desensitization (using bilateral stimulation to reprocess the memory)
Installation (reinforcing positive beliefs)
Body scan
Closure
Reevaluation
That “light thingy” people ask for? It’s only a fraction of the work. EMDR is not hypnosis. It's not erasing your memories. And it’s not magic. But it can absolutely reduce the emotional charge of traumatic memories and help you integrate them in a healthier way.
EMDR Is Especially Effective for Single-Event Trauma
If you’ve experienced a single, isolated traumatic event, like a car accident, medical trauma, or an assault, EMDR often works quickly and with lasting impact. Many clients report relief in just a few sessions.
Why? Because these memories often live in the brain as “stuck” experiences. EMDR helps unlock and reorganize them so they no longer feel like current threats.
Complex Trauma Requires More Time (and Preparation)
If your trauma history is more layered, especially if it stems from chronic childhood abuse, neglect, or unstable attachment relationships, EMDR is still a great option, but it requires a different pace.
People with complex trauma often need more time in the preparation phase of EMDR. This includes building emotional regulation skills, identifying internal resources, and learning how to stay grounded during tough emotional moments. Rushing this process can lead to overwhelm, panic, or feeling unsafe during sessions.
The goal of EMDR is not to retraumatize you. It’s to help your brain heal safely and sustainably. That means going slow if needed and building trust in the process.
Can EMDR Make Things Worse?
Short answer: sometimes, temporarily - yes. Like any trauma therapy, EMDR can stir up difficult emotions as the brain begins to reprocess painful memories.
This doesn’t mean the therapy is failing. It means your brain is doing the hard work of untangling old wiring. A good EMDR therapist will know how to spot dysregulation, pause the process, and return to stabilization strategies like grounding and resourcing.
If you’re in EMDR and notice intense symptoms (like nightmares, panic, or trouble sleeping), don’t wait to bring it up. These responses can be part of the process, but they need to be managed with care.
The Most Important Part? Your EMDR Therapist
Not all EMDR therapists are created equal. Some providers advertise EMDR as a one-size-fits-all solution, skipping important phases or downplaying the emotional intensity of the work. Others may not be fully trained or certified.
Here’s what to look for in a good EMDR therapist:
Certification or training through EMDRIA (the EMDR International Association)
Willingness to explain the eight phases and how they'll tailor them to your needs
A collaborative approach, where you’re encouraged to ask questions and slow the process when needed
Experience working with your specific type of trauma (single-event, childhood trauma, PTSD, etc.)
Ask questions. Advocate for yourself. And trust your gut. This is deeply personal work, and the right guide makes all the difference.
How to Know If EMDR Is Right for You
EMDR may be a strong fit if:
You have specific memories that still feel emotionally raw or triggering
You’ve tried talk therapy but haven’t felt true relief
You struggle with flashbacks, panic, nightmares, or avoidance
You want a structured, evidence-based approach to trauma
You’re ready to heal—but want to go at your own pace
EMDR may not be the best fit right now if:
You’re in an unsafe environment
You’re actively in crisis
You don’t yet have basic coping strategies for grounding
You’re working with a therapist who hasn’t clearly explained the process
EMDR Works, But It's Not the Hero - You Are
EMDR is an incredible therapy tool. But it’s just that, a tool. Healing happens when you consistently show up, stay curious, and work with a therapist who knows how to pace the process for your nervous system.
The results can be life-changing: freedom from emotional flashbacks, greater peace in your body, and the ability to live in the present instead of the past. But it takes time, intention, and often a little humor along the way.
You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just have to take the next step toward healing.
Need help finding an EMDR therapist or understanding whether it’s right for you? Contact Seen Therapy Services to learn more about our trauma-informed approach, EMDR intensives, and healing pathways tailored to you.
